My Dearly

After seeing all this pic of my dearly, i feel soo soo guilty of myself....no matter where he is and what he do, he always gives it a 100% performance. He wont even waste his time while waiting for the train to come...he keep himself updated and renewed his knowledge everytime by going to the bookstore to buy books or reading books....when he practice for the performance although he is quite good at it.....

How bout me???Whenever i'm waiting a bus, i just stand there stupidly by staring at the end of the road for the arrival of the bus....the most i'll do is listen to my mp3....Whenever i go to the bookstore, i will walk straight to the fashion magazines section instead of book section.....besides that i don't read in a bookstore where i admit that i do not like to read books....Whenever i play piano, i only play for those songs that i'm good with....i'll never try out and practice for a new pieces although i had been graduated from the musical school after grade 8.....

It's a huge contrast from my dear's life....it's just...totally different!!!! How can i be that.... He must had been disappointed to have this kind of fans.... I'd like to upgrade myself more often..... From now onwards, i'll commit myself onto all these things to upgrade myself....before changing the world, i must change myself first....GAMBATEH!!!!

What do you Feel?

38o超高溫 未來一周沒啦 2007/07/24 07:20 記者:記者陳俍任／台北報導
連續幾天超高溫，今天將有機會舒緩！中央氣象局指出，今天局部山區將出現午後雷陣雨，不過市區會下雨的地點不多，且全台除南投外，降雨機率只有百分之十到卅。

檳氣象局：陣雨持續至28日 民眾須防災情惡化updated:2007-07-24
（威南、大山腳訊）因豪雨而引發的威省及吉南大水災情況持續，其中威南災情最嚴重，因豪雨引發山洪，新邦安拔潤絨河水氾濫，導致新邦安拔和峇都交灣一帶週一（23日）早上水災情況惡化，238戶家庭超過1000名災黎疏散。

此外，檳州氣象局預測，馬六甲海峽及南中國海上空出現的大雲朵，使檳州近日連續數天下起陣雨，當局預料陣雨會持續至28日，因此民眾必須防備水災情況可能惡化。

威省已有3條河水的水位處於警戒水平，檳州水利灌溉局已啟動水泵機，以排出過多的水量。

新加坡•30年來上升兩度越來越熱updated:2007-07-23
（新加坡訊）全球暖化造成全球各地氣象出現變化，處於溫帶的四季國家最能明顯感受氣象變化所帶來的影響。身處四季如夏的新加坡，人們不容易感受全球暖化的影響，但變化卻已經悄然出現。

國大地理系副教授大衛•希傑特（DavidHiggit）說︰“70年代的平均溫度一直處於攝氏26度左右，但現在卻已經上升到28度，相差兩度左右。或許數字上看起來那並不算甚麼，但當它是年平均氣溫變化時，就算只是一度也是相當顯著的變化。”

====> After reading all these news, what do you feel? My heart always drop an inch whenever i heard all these news. All of these happens because of us....because of human!!!All of these are created by ouself. Now that the earth is sick, what did we do? Do we just leave it like that? Do we like the earth now more than before? No one ever think of that including me, not until the newspapers and multimedia started to inform us about the condition of the earth. Everything had change now. We MUST do our part to keep it alive!!! Mother Earth is now sick!!! LET US STAND UP AND HELP HER!!!It doesn't mean that you alone cannot do your part, everything have to start from YOU ALONE first!!!And get more people involved in this. I'm tryin my very best now, i wont switch on the aircond just to keep me feel cool, i wont throw the used paper away but to send it to recycle, i tried ask not to give plastic bags when i buy things, i tried my very best to reuse all the plastic material which are still good in condition. Although this wont help much, but at least i'm doing my part. We have to stand up and SAVE THE WORLD. There might be big possibility that the schene in the movie- THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW will arrive. Let's get started!!!

沉重的心情 17/7/2007

好久都没有一个人独处了，回家后都跟妈妈进进出出的，唯一一个人的时候就是看电视的时候。现在回到这个房间，感觉还真是出奇的寂寞。前两天的生活太充实了，把自己给搞垮了。所以今天先让自己休息一下，但没想到时间还真是难打发呀。

这次我有留级了，而这个学期我拿了一科务必要及格的科目-MBB。今天第一堂课老师就已强调了，我听了心里好难受！顿时就觉得为什么自己就是比别人笨，做什么都不会。书又不会读，试班班长又不会做，什么都不会，只会吃喝玩乐。这个不是笨是什么？

我很痛苦！总觉得这个年头事事都不顺，读书不顺、人际关系不顺、甚至连家里也不顺。从去年开始就被留级结果现在比别人慢、在人际关系上面也不顺，一大堆人不喜欢我（他们嘴上不说但其实我可以感受到他们对我的不耐烦），这个我也认了。反正一个人也没有什么不可以呀，而且我还有唯一的一个知己- Patricia。不知道是不是因为她人太好的关系所以我很喜欢和她在一起，不管和她讲什么她都会用心的听。家里-哼！更不用说了、老的是这样，小的也是这样。我妈辛苦，我好怕她有一天撑不下去了就会做那些我想也不敢想的事。我一定要快点毕业，我不可以在被留级了。我妈对我的期望很高！我不可以再让她失望。我已经三番两次的令她失望了，我一定要加把劲奋斗到底！我是妈妈的依靠了，我一定要很加油！不可以再被留级了！不管怎样我一定要很加油！从现在开始，我决定少于团契的人有互动。因为他们常常在周末会有活动，只要我远离他们我就不会面对这些诱惑。这个学期开始，每个周末我都要去找Patricia一起温书做功课。诗班班长的职位我也会辞掉，希望他们谅解我。我不可以再这样颓废下去了，我妈很需要我的！快快读完回去陪她，作她精神的支柱。明年的这个时候我一定要毕业！这是我对我自己的承诺！或许过程会很艰难，求主帮助我！我只要几个就好！我不要求多。

主啊！如果你看见我被撒旦攻击，求你一定要把握拉出来！
主啊！如果你看见我懒惰，求你一定要重重的惩罚我！
主啊！如果你看见我贪恋物质，求你一定要提醒我世界某个角落的需要！
主啊！我知道我是不配得到你的爱，我知道我是个罪人，我很清楚的知道唯有主你的宝血才能洗净我的一切罪恶。
主啊！求你看顾我，让撒旦远离我！

A pic i MUST Comment

This is the pic which i feel uncomfortable with. I just don't know why i have this kind of feeling. It's my dearest LEEHOM of course and i don't have the feeling of dislike Selina however. I just don't know why, i always feel uneasy when i see this pic. So i must shout it out here.

To me, LEEHOM in this pic seems to be uneasy as well. Maybe he might had been too tired due to his work load the day before he take this pic or capturing this MV. And that Selina's face is like...she's more willing to take this pic than LEEHOM did. It's like the guy was being forced to marry tat gal because tat gal is pregnant!!!Haha, i'm very bad!!!!

In conclusion, i don't like this pic.

New Campus....New Semester....

The new Monash campus is Malaysia had finally opened!!!This is ridiculous...it's so big and nice...everything is new...I so like the brand new LT and the lab and also the 3 level library....whenever i walk into this new campus, i have a strong desire to make me feel like studying...but the thing that i don't like is the cafeteria. It's not much choice to make compare to the one in sunway. I still prefer the sunway campus cafeteria. So lunch, we'd rather walk for 10 mins to the food court outside under the hot and striking sun....Now, i'm very worried for my skin....I'm goin to get a sunscream soon....

However, it sounds nice for all the new things....it's the toughest semester for me!!!I've once again fail one subject....so this sem i've to retake it again. This is not my point. My point is, this sem i'm takin one subject which only offered this sem. Which means if i do fail tat subject, i'll have to take 2 subject to replace that one subject....That's not the big deal yet...the big deal is that...that subject is the most horrible subject among all of the studies...(according to seniors)...if i din do well in the lab and assignemnt, it means i've fail the whole unit...which means i do not have to take the final exam anymore!!!!AAARRGGHHH.....i can't believe this....first day of the lec i've started to feel stress and cry at night because of imagining all the consequences....Not only this subject is a nightmare, there's 2 more subjects....This sems is the most horrible sem that i had ever take....and i think my study life is getting worst....i must do this....there's someone waiting on me and depending on me....i must not fall...i must stand straight....i must face all these....

GOD, please hold my hands when i'm lost.
GOD, please push me up when i fall.
GOD, please lighten up my path in front of me.
GOD, please take care of me so that i won't follow satan's pathway.
GOD, i have to be strong.
GOD, i have to be calm.
GOD, without YOU by my side i wont be able to do all these.
GOD, i knew YOU are always there.

My 21st Bday

These are the pic that i took by myself...includin all the ppl that gatherin around my house and my new hairstyle...haha...

1) My 21-year-old look....HEHEHE....COPYRIGHT from ELLA....hahaha

2) This is the receipt for my hairstyle....with the DAY that GOD created me....

3) Whole bunch of ppl tryin to give me surprise....but they fail instead....

夜间的灵感

每一次看回我所写的一些文章，都会觉得有种莫名的伤感。应该是因为我太敏感了吧，只要有一点点的芝麻绿豆，我就会觉得世界是灰暗的。这种现象在今年（我发现）特别严重。我甚至会开始怀疑别人对我的好，开始怀疑那个人对我的居心。我的世界突然变得好灰暗，以前在我心里的那颗太阳跑去那里了呢？难道真的像‘太阳浩劫Sunshine’那部戏里的太阳一样吗？

每次功课的压力都弄到我喘不过气来，有时候甚至想过放弃。但是，听见妈妈在电话里说我们是她的依靠时，就会有鼓动力让我继续下去。好想明天就立刻毕业，然后回家陪她。没关系，很快了。明年的这个时候就是我准备毕业的时候了。我一定不会再给我借口不极格，会不极格都是我自己造成的。我不会再让这样的事情再一次的发生。

虽然每次都会觉得人心好险恶，但至少我知道还是有一些面临绝种的人在外面。男生对我来说都是一样的，没有好和坏男人，只有用心或不用心。往往在我身边的都是一些吊儿郎当的，样子看起来是一脸正经但好像笑里都藏着一把刀。这难道就是单恋的后遗症吗? 我不敢否认，多多少少有一点成份在。我可以很肯定的说，神为我安排的那一位还没出现。没关系，耐心等待必要欢呼！神知道我什么时候准备好，什么时候最适合。我的一切的一切，神都知道。

就算全世界的人事物是假的，神对我的爱永远都是真的。一切权柄荣耀都是我父的。

原来我是那么在乎的 27/6/2007

一直以来我都知道我是很讨厌别人动了我的东西而不放回原位的，我还以为或许时间久了我的习惯会改。但原来不是的，本性就是如此了就很难改的了。

昨晚我因为安顿我外婆她们后就赶回来家开会。在我等着Monorail时容循打电话给我，跟我借衣服换，我也答应了而且还叫他随便（既然我不在家）。当我一到家时就发现我房间的灯是开着的，当我踏进房间时，里面是没有人的！更离谱的是，我的电脑是开着的，而且戏是被停顿（pause）在那里的！这还不是什么大件事，还有更离谱的是-他们竟让真的很听我的话-随便！原本花了一个早上收拾的房间，地上又放满了东西而且还真的是随便放的那种！

天啊！我给我自己的解释是-因为我们在外面开会所以没地方放。电脑呢-就是他们太闷了所以开来看。那灯呢，就是他们出去得太赶啦。在这些自我安慰的话后，心理至少没有这么难受了。

怎知我们一堆人出去帮思箐庆祝好生日回来后，我要准备冲凉时，发现我的衣服像被贼翻过一样（是我夸张了点），我心里顿时就有一股怒气涌上来。我一直对容循的印象都很好的，在我心目中她不像那种会做出以上种种事情的人。但我觉得罪魁祸首应该不只她一个。

我生气不是因为她们开我电脑看我的戏，我生气不是因为她们弄乱我房间和我的衣服，我气的是如果你要用我的电脑，那拜托你-如果你看到我没在家，麻烦你跟我所一声。难道我不会借吗？我有时虽然是吝奢了点，但这样的东西我没好吝奢的吧？最起码，你看好不用就这样开着放在那里吧？还要是停顿的（虽然我也常做这样的事），但我可不知道你们放它在那种情况多久了呀！这样对我电脑的系统带来很大的伤害呀！东西摊在地上我还没这么气，最气的就是我的衣服！明明排得好好的衣服被弄乱了！天啊！你要跟我借衣服，如果你要一件一件拉出来看它是怎样的，没关系！这是一定要的啊！我们去逛街不也是这样吗？但是，重点是，这里是我家啊！我的衣服都是我自己折的啊！你把它一件一件拉出来，最起码你也把它折回去让排好好的吧？这种原理应该没有很深吧？图书馆不也是每次都说：看过的书请放回原位吗？这是一样的道理啊！他们搞到好像逛街买衣服一样。

这虽然很小事，但我心里就是很不舒服。现在回想起来，那股怒气就是会上来。我这一生人最讨厌人家拿了我东西没放回原位和拿了我东西没经过我的同意！好气！！！气死我了！